August 3, 2012

 I figure its time to post something to get everyone caught up.

PART ONE

We got a call around 10:30pm on August 3rd that there was a 1 year old boy at the Children's Hospital who needed to be placed with a foster family. We were just walking out of a movie...it was Total Recall. The movie was awful, seriously. So dumb.

Anyways, we rushed home to get a few things then headed out to Salt Lake. We picked him up in the children's ER. It was really late at that point, and he was sleeping. So we just got all the neccessary info, put him in the car, and headed home! The first few days were really rough. I'm sure C was scared, and confused, and at 11 months he couldn't understand. It was really difficult to try and figure out what things he liked to eat, did he take a bottle, did he like to have a binkie, did he have a sleep schedule...? He was afraid of the bath, he didn't take a bottle, he was dehydrated, hungry, constipated, and so so tired. So we just snuggled him, and tried to give him plenty of juice, formula, and baby food. After a few days we cut the baby food out completely and he just ate solid foods. He gained 6 lbs in the first 10 days that he was in our home, and by the second week he was getting into somewhat of a routine. Nap times were still terrible, and I couldn't figure out what to do. After a month or so we finally got him on a real sleep routine and he is MUCH happier!

The first night, right after we got home...

 


PART TWO

I wish I could post a pic of his sweet little face. He has the most perfect complexion...(Cherokee Indian, coming from his mother's side, and Caucasian from his father)...perfectly smooth olive skin, with BIG blue eyes. With his long, long black eyelashes and full eyebrows. I do think he's going to have a bit of an eyebrow situation when he gets older. Gonna have to handle those LOL He has perfectly dark pink lips, and as of today, he has six teeth! When we got him he only had his two front bottom teeth, now he has three on top and three on the bottom.

At the rodeo, about a week after having C placed with us...

His favorite activities include: eating everything in sight, blowing kisses, dancing, pulling the dog's tail, riding his "bike", taking walks in the stroller, eating grass/rocks/wood chips, swinging high, and being tickled. He also LOVES to play with his "cousin" Graham. Best buddies. Graham's name for C is something like "Chandoooo"...it's the cutest thing ever.

 
His biggest, most recent, accomplishment is walking!! He took his first steps, on his own, earlier this week. He also started saying "Uh oh!" this week too. He will RAWR like a dinosaur, and he's got the K part of "truck" ;)

His favorite foods are: everything.

LOL But he really loves: yogurt, scrambled eggs with ketchup, black beans, burritos, mashed potatoes, mac n cheese, Doritos, cheese, fruit snacks, spaghetti, peanut butter sandwiches, and ANYTHING that could be considered a dessert. He has only ever refused one food: strawberries. He would devour an entire piece of fish before he would swallow one bite of a strawberry. Odd.

He loves Beamer (our dog), and Beamer certainly loves him too! With a constant flow of goldfish, cheese sticks, and Teddy Grahams falling on the floor...what's not to love?! Eh, at least it saves me from having to clean it up.

C is also COMPLETELY in love with Mark. He gets soooo excited when he see Mark in the morning, or when we visit him at work, or when Mark gets home from work. He kicks his legs and squeals "dada! dada!" But I don't blame him, I think Mark is pretty awesome too. (I'm pretty sure that C's father must have been the primary caretaker, because C is really drawn to men...and "dada" is not something we taught him, he was already babbling "dada" from the time he was placed with us).  

 (ignore the black bars on the sides of some of the pics, I don't know what that's all about...)

I think these would have to be my top 3 favorite parts of the day:

1.) Picking C up out of his crib in the morning, and having him immediately snuggle deep down into my neck
2.) Watching him climb up on top of Mark in the morning and say "DADADADA!!!" to wake him up. And there's an occasional hit to the face or sippy cup chucked at his forehead. But Mark loves it ;)
3.) Seeing him kick his legs and squeal in delight when "dada" comes home from work

And then there's the comments from strangers like "Oh he has your blue eyes!" or "Are they twins/brothers?" (referring to C and Graham). Hahaha Gotta love it. Of course my response is always "Thank you!" or "They're cousins!"

PART THREE

Now, I know everyone wants to know the latest on his parent's situation...but I really don't feel like its appropriate to post those details on here. They have their struggles in life, but they deserve to have some privacy to the details their lives.

But the simple breakdown is like this:

1.) Both parents have 8 months to complete several steps that will lead them to an addiction-free life, permanent housing, jobs, and necessary life and parenting skills. We are currently 3 months into those 8 months, and they still have a long road ahead of them.

2.) Each parent gets 1 hour a week to visit with C. Whether or not they choose to show up to those visits...well, that's up to them.

3.) Our next court date is December 19th.

4.) If both parents are unable or unwilling to complete step 1, then the judge will make C "legally free" for adoption. This just means that the parental rights will be terminated, and DCFS and the judge will begin the process of deciding who will adopt C.

5.) Mark and I are NOT given preference for adoption. First preference will go to direct kinship (so far, the only kinship that has come forward are in other states). Next, the family that adopted C's siblings (years ago) will have the option to adopt. BUT (this is where is gets a bit tricky), there is a chance that the judge would allow us to adopt C instead of him going to the family who adopted his siblings. There are many reasons why, but basically it comes down to the fact that C has never had a relationship with those siblings, and to place him there would create a huge disruption in his life (removing him from us) and in those kids' lives too (having another kid thrown into the mix).

6.) There are WAY too many things that may or may not happen for us to know right now how this will end up. We don't think a whole lot about the future, we try to just live in the moment and enjoy C. Sometimes comments like "I hope he doesn't have to leave your family" or "He is so much better off with you guys" can trigger an emotional response. We don't like to think about those things, it makes us too sad.

A hike to donut falls...

So, just try to stick with us and live in the moment!! :) We are on the Lord's errand, and we feel incredibly fulfilled. We have purpose to our days. We have a tiny little life who, even temporarily, relies on us completely.

Most days I feel like I am doing everything wrong, and that I should and could be doing a lot better. I definitely get frustrated, cry, and wonder what the heck I'm doing. I wish that I more patient, that I knew how to respond better to things that seem completely foreign to me. And just when I'm starting to lose it and sit on the floor and cry, this sweet little guy will come crawling over to me, give me his biggest baby grin, and reach for me. Then I know, I'm doing alright. He loves me, he trusts me, and he is happy. I'm doing my best.

(seriously, I don't know what's up with the black bars on the sides of the pics...)

C may not stay in our home forever, but he will most definitely stay in our hearts forever. His pictures will never come off of our walls, he is a permanent fixture in our home.

"His time may not be our time, but He will always keep his promises" President Eyring

Utah State Fair...

Park City...

Fall Festival in Heber...