Adoption Charity

It's no secret how expensive adoption is.

Most infertile couples have two options when it comes to starting their family : IVF or Adoption. Over the past 5 years Mark and I have tried our hand at both adoption (private and with LDSFS) and IVF. Last year we did two rounds of IVF, with no success.

Today we are back in the adoption swing of things, and we are so excited! We've both decided that IVF is NOT something we ever want to go back to, and we love that we can focus all of our efforts on building our family through adoption.

Private adoptions done through a licensed adoption agency in the US will range from $15,00-$40,000+ (depending on a variety of factors including travel between states, attorney fees, and medical fees for the expectant mother and the baby). I wish that adoption wasn't so expensive...I wish that every deserving family could adopt a precious little baby with fees that were reasonable. I wish that medical costs related to adoption were covered by our health insurance. I wish that all employers offered an Adoption Assistance Program.

The down and dirty fact of the matter is this: ADOPTIVE FAMILIES ARE GOING INTO DEBT.

We don't want to go into debt, not if we don't have to. That is why we have spent the better part of the last few months begging for money from our family members LOL! Okay, maybe not begging, but we definitely asked. And today we are in a much better position (financially, money in the savings account) than we were 3 months ago.

But here's the thing...we still don't have enough.

I wish that we could sell our cars, shut off our cell phones, never watch TV, and eat ramen noodles every night until we have the money saved. But honestly, that's not realistic. We do our absolute best, but just like most of you reading this - we live paycheck to paycheck. Being a grown up sucks.

Alright, let me get to it already...we are fundraising. We had several hundred wristbands made (you now, the silicone ones...think "Livestrong") and we are going to be selling them.

They are red, and they have the wording "Adoption: Love Makes A Family" on them. They are going to be $5 each, or whatever you feel comfortable donating. There will be a page on our business website (advancehomefitness.com) where you can make the purchase using PayPal.

Our hope is that we can raise WAY more money that what we actually need to finish saving for our adoption. Our goal is to not only help ourselves, BUT TO HELP OTHER ADOPTIVE COUPLES. We want to donate the excess (not used by us for our adoption) to another financially needy adoptive couple.

SO, the page will be up and running on our website by the end of the day. The wristbands will be hand-delivered or mailed to you the week of August 6th.

{{AS OF 3:30 pm, THE WRISTBANDS ARE READY FOR PURCHASE!}}

http://www.advancehomefitness.com/Charitable-Causes.html

PLEASE please please go buy one. Or two. Or 50. haha

Thank you SO much, we love everyone who has helped us so much through this journey. XOXO

Nursery Craft Time!

Yes, it is true...we have a nursery. No baby. But we have a nursery.

We have the crib, and the dresser, and the glider...and now we have some super cute box shelves and a rocking chair! The shelves we had from before, they used to be in our guest room (but now we don't have a guest room because we have a nursery). The rocking chair was mine when I was very small...and Mark has been getting on me for months about doing something with it (or he wanted to throw it away! Ugh!). I had started to sand it down last summer and I was going to stain it dark, but then I realized that was a MUCH bigger task than I had originally planned. So it sat there...and sat there...and now here we are a year later and it was still sitting (wow, talk about procrastination). Finally I decided to paint it. Spray paint it. It was SO easy and literally took me like 10 minutes.

The box shelves were already black, I just used some painters tape to create a striped design on one and a chevron print on the other. Then spray painted. Let it dry and peeled the tape off! Bam!

I had the nursery made gender neutral to begin with, because the primary use of it was for foster care. We still don't know if we will end up adopting a boy or a girl, but we want to have a circus theme. So the colors we are going with are bright orange, yellow, lime green, and (depending on if we adopt a boy or a girl) blue or bright pink. So anyways, I painted the shelves yellow and the chair green. The gender-specific colors will come into play in the bumper (which Mark's mom is going to make for us), and a few things that we will hang on the walls.

Here are a few ideas that I've found on Pinterest...

Now, to find that baby! ;) xoxo

It's Confession Time...

Today I parked in the "Expectant Mother" parking spot at BuyBuyBaby.

I also purchased diapers. They smell like baby.

And wipes.

And onesies.

I *might* have a slight obsession with girl clothes.

Oh yeah, and a bottle. But just one.

There, I said it! I gotta be honest, it is kind of weird buying baby stuff. Especially when you don't have a baby. I feel like a weirdo. But then I remind myself that it needs to be done, and that I am indeed NOT a weirdo, because adoption can happen FAST. Take the situation we were presented with two weeks ago- that sweet little baby was presented to us on Wednesday and needed to come home on Friday. And had we adopted him, I would have been completely unprepared (we didn't have a car seat, diapers, nothing...). So here I am buying baby stuff (and fending off all of the employees who kept asking me if I was purchasing items for someone's registry...NO).

Anyways...to justify my parking spot I had a conversation with myself that went something like this..."Well it says 'Expectant Mother' and I am expectant...I'm just not EXPECTING." For the diapers, wipes, and bottle (just one bottle, because it's kind of the non-committal way of preparing)...I figured it would be best to have those on hand so that I don't have to feel like I need to rush to the store while we're on the way to the hospital to get the baby. And the onesies...well...mostly I just can't resist myself. LOL Don't worry, I kept the receipts so that I can return the girl stuff if we adopt a boy (and vice-versa).

Last week while my parents were visiting they also purchased the car seat we wanted! And here's another confession: I took the car seat out of the box and kept it in the living room for like 5 days simply because I like to look at it :) And here is a confession for Mark (ha!)...on multiple occasions he has pretended to pick up "the baby" out of the car seat all like "Aww little baby you're so cute" HAHAH I love it. He's the best.

Alright, confession time is over! I hope you don't think I'm a crazy lady now...

Spreading the Word: A How-To-Guide

We've been getting a lot of questions lately about how people should be spreading the word about Mark and I wanting to adopt. For example, let's say you have a friend who approaches you and says "I just found out I'm pregnant, and I'm think I am going to place the baby for adoption." Now what? What do you say? Where do you send them? Here is our How-To-Guide!

"My friend/co-worker/girl I know is pregnant"

1.) First, find out (gently and politely) if she is planning on, or even considering, placing the baby for adoption. If she is, then let her know that you know a couple who is looking to adopt. If she is not ready to talk about it (sometimes it is just too early to be thinking about something like that for an expectant mother...I know if it were me I'd be in complete shock and wouldn't even know what I was going to do. Anyways, give them a few weeks or a couple months to get more comfortable with the idea, then talk to them about it again).

**Expectant mothers who are looking to place their child for adoption do not have to work with an adoption agency (although it is an option)...if she finds an adoptive family on her own then the adoptive family would hire an attorney and they would complete all of the legalities that way.**

2.) You could let her know a bit about us, depending on how well you know us, and then suggest she look at our blog. Give her this link: mark-brittaltmyer.blogspot.com. She can look through all of our info, posts, and pics without feeling like she has to commit to anything.

3.) Then if she feels like she wants to contact us further, she can email us at balty06@me.com.

"I don't know anyone who is looking to place their baby for adoption, but I want to help spread the word!"

1.) Share our link on Facebook! This is the fastest and most efficient way of reaching out to your hundreds of FB friends (and if you have your friends also share the link, and so on and so on...then it really starts to spread!). When you share our blog link make sure that you say something like, "Hey! Check out my friend's blog. They are an awesome couple hoping to adopt."

2.) Spotlight us on your blog. If you have a blog, make a blog post about us and then share it on your Facebook page.

3.) Follow our blog. If you have a blog, you can follow our blog (the link is on the right hand side of our blog, I believe it says "Follow This Site") and then your blog friends will be more likely to check out our blog as well.

But most of all, just keep us in the back of your mind! That way if you ever hear of a situation, we will be the first people you think of! And when you do come across someone who is looking to place, send us a Facebook message, email, or text to let us know that you are sharing our info :)

Ready, set, go spread the word!